Empathy is the ability to understand and care about how someone else feels. It’s what helps people connect, support each other, and feel less alone during hard times. But not all empathy looks the same. In fact, there are different types of empathy, and each one plays a unique role in our relationships.
Emotional empathy
The first type is called emotional empathy. This is when you actually feel what another person is feeling. If someone is sad, you feel their sadness too. If they are excited, you feel their excitement. It’s like their emotions pass through you as if they were your own. This kind of empathy helps you deeply connect with someone. You don’t just understand that they’re upset—you feel it inside yourself. Emotional empathy is very common among close friends, partners, and family members. Sometimes, it can even feel overwhelming, especially if you’re highly sensitive or don’t know how to separate your emotions from someone else’s. But it also makes people feel truly seen and cared for.
Read more about emotional empathy here
Cognitive empathy
Another type of empathy is cognitive empathy. This one is more about the mind than the heart. Cognitive empathy means you can understand what someone is thinking or feeling, even if you don’t feel it yourself. You’re able to imagine what it’s like to be in their shoes and consider their point of view. For example, you may not feel nervous about giving a speech, but you can understand why someone else would. This kind of empathy is helpful in conversations, disagreements, or problem-solving. It allows people to communicate clearly and respectfully, even when they don’t feel the same way. Cognitive empathy is especially useful in leadership, teaching, counseling, and parenting.
Read more about cognitive empathy here
Compassionate empathy
The third type is called compassionate empathy, also known as empathic concern. This kind of empathy goes one step further. It combines both emotional and cognitive empathy, but adds something else—a desire to help. When you feel compassionate empathy, you not only understand and feel what someone is going through, but you also want to take action. You might offer a kind word, help them solve a problem, or simply be present and supportive. Compassionate empathy leads to kindness and care. It’s what turns empathy into something useful and healing.
Read more about compassionate empathy here
Understanding these types of empathy helps us recognize how we relate to others. Some people are more naturally emotional in their empathy. Others might be better at understanding thoughts and perspectives. Some may feel empathy but not know how to show it or help. That’s okay. We all have different ways of connecting, and empathy can be practiced and improved over time.
Lack of empathy
Sometimes people struggle with empathy altogether. This may happen due to past trauma, stress, or certain mental health conditions. But even in those cases, empathy is something that can be learned. It starts with being curious about others, slowing down to really listen, and caring enough to ask how someone is doing and mean it.
Read more about lack of empathy here
Conclusion
In daily life, we use these types of empathy in different ways. You might feel emotional empathy when your friend is crying and you feel like crying too. You might use cognitive empathy when your co-worker is stressed and you try to understand their pressure, even if you’re not feeling it yourself. And you show compassionate empathy when you comfort a child who scraped their knee or when you check in on someone going through a hard time.
Empathy is one of the most important ways we connect as humans. It doesn’t require you to fix anything or say the perfect thing. It only asks that you care enough to see the other person’s experience and be there with them in some way. Whether through feelings, understanding, or support, empathy helps us show up for each other—and that makes the world a little kinder.